Confessions of a Dangerous mind

"Drugs, Diamonds or Dollars?" the General asked as if all the 3 were legitimate to carry.

"How about all the 3 in equal proportions?" I said.

Who am I? I am Yuri Varlov. Into my late 30s and with medium build and receding hairline, people say that I resemble Nicholas Cage. I am a dealer. No no...not the ordinary dealer you happen to meet around. I am an arms dealer. Oh...you despise me right? Well that’s your personal opinion and you can do that. I may have failed academically but I passed the school of life with honors as I knew how to make a quick buck. I had always wanted to make it big in life and wanted to make it soon. What better than transporting and supplying illegal arms?

In my childhood I always wondered as to why did these people needed to fight and cant say truce. But as I grew up I understood that this truce would only be acceptable by the common people, but would hurt the political bigwigs. You cannot imagine the amount of money each country spends in a war and how much the heads of government’s and arms dealers like me make most out of it. Once when a friend asked if I had any guilt for this, I shot back "My bullets are better than alcohol and tobacco. At least they have a safety switch to turn it off." But I always had a rule. I supplied guns and left the place after getting paid immediately. The last thing I wanted to see was to see someone use it to kill someone. Chicken hearted aint I?

Today I came here in Africa to supply guns for the first time to some crazy dictator who had managed to rule with an iron hand for long time. My Kalashnikovs we handled by kids who were just about the same height as the guns. Just as we were having negotiations, the 10 year old kid of the general took the gun to a far by tent and shot a kid about 6 years old in the head. He laughed and said that he was testing the gun.

The dead kid was about the same age as my son. I felt a knot in my stomach and left as soon as I could. The amount of guns that I supplied to such small countries in a year was the same that big nations as US, UK, France, China and Russia supplied to some nations in a day. Ironically these 5 nations are the permanent members of the UN Security council. God bless the world.

I reached home and went to my son’s room and kissed him good bye while he was asleep. In the table nearby I found a Smith and Wesson .38 type toy gun. I took it in my hands and looked at them for a long time. Without any rhyme or reason I started to cry and angrily threw the gun into the trashcan nearby. Just then my phone rang and it was the same General.

"Mr. Yuri. We would appreciate if you could supply us 200 more 'Angels' (code name for AK -47) the next week. Is it possible?"

"No problem" I found myself saying that without hesitation.

But then I knew that even if I turn into a Jesus or Mahatma and abolish my gun trade, these silly wars are not going to stop. If not me, then someone else will take my place and supply these goodies. What a slimy bastard I had become.

P.S: Inspired from the movie Lord of War.